When my daughter-in-law Brittany asked me to babysit my grandson Noah for the weekend, I expected cuddles, cartoons, and cookies — not a handwritten invoice for eggs, water, and toilet paper. Despite our sometimes strained relationship and her well-known obsession with “boundaries,” I said yes without hesitation. I love Noah, and I was excited to spend uninterrupted time with him. But when I arrived, I was greeted by chaos: dishes piled in the sink, an empty fridge, no wipes or baby food in sight, and barely enough diapers to last a day. So I rolled up my sleeves — because that’s what grandmothers do. I cleaned the kitchen, restocked the pantry, washed tiny clothes, and cooked meals from scratch. I gave Noah bubble baths, read him stories, and made him giggle until bedtime. By Sunday night, I was exhausted but happy. I’d done it all with love. Then Monday morning came. As I packed up to leave, I found a folded note on the counter: “Thanks again! 🙂 Please Venmo $40 by Friday to cover food, water, and paper goods. -Brittany” I blinked. Was this real? I’d just given my entire weekend, filled her home, and cared for her child — and she was billing me for eggs and toilet paper? Once the shock wore off, I got inspired. Back at home, I drafted my own invoice on formal letterhead: “Grandmother Services, Est. 1993” — detailing 18 years of unpaid labor raising her husband. Diapers: $3,000. School supplies: $8,000. Food, clothes, orthodontics, and emotional support? The total soared past $200,000. Then, with a flourish, I applied a “family discount” of 99.98%, leaving a remaining balance of $40. I sealed it in a gold-trimmed envelope and dropped it off with a smile. Not long after, my son Ethan called me — half-laughing, half-apologizing. He hadn’t known about Brittany’s little invoice and assured me he was fully on my side. A week later, Brittany Venmoed me the $40 with a note: “To settle my debt. ;)” I laughed, then donated the money to a local children’s hospital in Noah’s name. Because the best revenge isn’t petty — it’s clever, classy, and comes with itemized receipts.
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