70-year-old widow posts newspaper advert looking for new husband, only for it to go viral

Getting back into the dating world can be strange, and intimidating, especially if it’s been a long time since you were last single. Of course, the most important lesson to remember is that it’s crucial you stay open to others and don’t judge anyone too quickly.

It was with that in mind that I decided to share a funny story I recently came across online. It involves a 70-year-old widow, a newspaper advert, and a search for a new husband.

She was at home one day when her doorbell suddenly rang … only, she couldn’t possibly have predicted who would be on the other side.

Read the full hilarious joke below — and make sure you stick with it until the punchline.

A lonely 70-year-old widow decided that it was time to marry again…

She put an ad in the local newspaper that read:

“Husband wanted! Must be in my age group, must not beat me, must not run around on me and must still be good in bed. All applicants please apply in person.”

The following day, she heard the doorbell. Much to her dismay, she opened the door to see a gray-haired gentleman sitting in a wheelchair. He had no arms or legs.

“You’re not really asking me to consider you, are you?” the widow asked: “Just look at you — you have no legs!”

The old gent smiled: “Therefore, I cannot run around on you!”

“You don’t have any arms either!” she snorted.

Again, the old man smiled: “Therefore, I can never beat you!”

She raised an eyebrow and asked intently: “Are you still good in bed?”

The old man leaned back, beamed a big smile and said: “I rang the doorbell, didn’t I?”

Why not help cheer a friend up? Share this joke and help give someone a good laugh!

VS

Related Posts

My SIL Threw a Pool Party at My House While I Was in the ER With My Newborn – What I Came Home To Was Unforgivable

Three weeks ago, I came home from the ER with my newborn daughter, Everly, after a difficult delivery and complications. I was still weak, stitched, and barely…

I Sold My Car to Pay Tuition, Then Got Shocking Call

My husband left when my daughter Jane was five. No fight, no betrayal—just a quiet sentence at the kitchen table and a suitcase by the door the…

My Husband Tried to Save Easter Dinner—What I Saw Changed Everything

I told my husband I couldn’t do Easter this year. It was our first without my mom, and I was barely holding myself together. But Liam kissed…

MIL Shaved My Son’s Curls — Husband’s Revenge Shocked Everyone

My five-year-old son Leo had beautiful golden curls—something my mother-in-law, Brenda, never approved of. She constantly made remarks about how boys “should” look, but my husband Mark…

My Step Siblings Abandoned Grandma — I Made Them Pay

Some moments reveal exactly who people are. My step-siblings and I were never truly close—just polite strangers tied together by marriage. The only real bond in our…

Millionaire’s Bride Walks Away, Choosing Freedom Over Luxury Life

She was told she had “made it,” as if success were something fixed and universally agreed upon. Overnight, her life seemed to transform through association with wealth,…

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *