70-year-old widow posts newspaper advert looking for new husband, only for it to go viral

Getting back into the dating world can be strange, and intimidating, especially if it’s been a long time since you were last single. Of course, the most important lesson to remember is that it’s crucial you stay open to others and don’t judge anyone too quickly.

It was with that in mind that I decided to share a funny story I recently came across online. It involves a 70-year-old widow, a newspaper advert, and a search for a new husband.

She was at home one day when her doorbell suddenly rang … only, she couldn’t possibly have predicted who would be on the other side.

Read the full hilarious joke below — and make sure you stick with it until the punchline.

A lonely 70-year-old widow decided that it was time to marry again…

She put an ad in the local newspaper that read:

“Husband wanted! Must be in my age group, must not beat me, must not run around on me and must still be good in bed. All applicants please apply in person.”

The following day, she heard the doorbell. Much to her dismay, she opened the door to see a gray-haired gentleman sitting in a wheelchair. He had no arms or legs.

“You’re not really asking me to consider you, are you?” the widow asked: “Just look at you — you have no legs!”

The old gent smiled: “Therefore, I cannot run around on you!”

“You don’t have any arms either!” she snorted.

Again, the old man smiled: “Therefore, I can never beat you!”

She raised an eyebrow and asked intently: “Are you still good in bed?”

The old man leaned back, beamed a big smile and said: “I rang the doorbell, didn’t I?”

Why not help cheer a friend up? Share this joke and help give someone a good laugh!

VS

Related Posts

This Wedding Looked Perfect — Until One Whisper Ruined Everything

They say weddings unite families—but mine nearly tore ours apart. I thought the hardest moment would be watching my daughter marry my ex-husband, Mark, until my son…

How to Refresh Your Pillows: Simple Steps for a Cleaner, Healthier Night’s Sleep

Over time, even the softest and most reliable pillows begin to show subtle signs of wear—yellowing, lingering odors, or fabric that no longer feels as fresh as…

How 20 Motorcyclists Arrived Out of Nowhere and Rebuilt Everything I Lost

What happened the day twenty bikers rolled onto my driveway is something I still struggle to put into words. Their engines shook the street, their boots hit…

FROM SWASHBUCKLING LEGEND TO TIMELESS ICON: HOW PIRATES OF THE CARIBBEAN AND CAPTAIN JACK SPARROW FOREVER CHANGED CINEMA

When Pirates of the Caribbean: The Curse of the Black Pearl first sailed into theaters in 2003, few could have predicted the enormous cultural wave it would create. Audiences…

The Biker Who Became Her Guardian How an Old Woman Counting Pennies Changed My Life

He thought he was just paying for bread. Instead, he was stepping into the life of Eva, an eighty-three-year-old widow who had survived Auschwitz as a child…

My Ex-Husband Took the House, the Car, and All Our Money in the Divorce — He Never Saw the Twist That Was Waiting for Him

When James moved into the house he’d fought so viciously to keep, he believed he had secured his legacy. He posed in doorways, hosted friends, and filled…

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *